Silencio

It’s like in Mulholland Drive…

Three years. It’s been three years now. Teardrops after stomach pains after knees pains after eczema on the hands after teardrops after…
Three years of this melody. Of this rhythm… It never stops. Every morning is a promise of a new pain. In every drop you sweat at gym stands the shadow of the tears that will run at night. With every shape you build rises the threat of a pain inside of you. Every battle you win, it’s an heavier burden you will eventually carry, your next villain, your next enemy who will get a flawless victory. You see your Demon your best friend…
And then, you procrastinate the big fight. But who can escape the blade of the guillotine ? It seems like a deja vu all over again and again. It’s a vain try to put altogether the pieces of the jigsaw of life. It seems like they will never match as you repeat the same mistakes day after day. You never learn. And you won’t be able to do so. Never.
What can be unbearable in your life when you have everything you possibly need to live ? This is too far too complex that even coaches or friends can’t make you open your eyes. Why do you refuse to let it go ? There is a little music in your head and in your heart that invites to sleep all the time, to run away, to get back on your box. This little music that cover all the voices around you, that makes you deaf.
But still, there is no way to shut this…